The Shit we some of us are in!

Friday November 14, 2008
Two single mums turn to prostitution to feed kids

TWO single mothers became part-time prostitutes to make ends meet after their ex-husbands failed to pay maintenance despite the Syariah Court order.
Worse still, the two women – a security guard and a cleaner – had to allow their colleagues to pay in instalments for “services rendered” to earn extra money.

These were some concerns raised by the Syariah Judicial Department at a seminar, reported Berita Harian.

Department director-general Datuk Ibrahim Lembut said that one of the women, a mother of six, turned to prostitution two months after her divorce.“She offered services to her colleagues and was willing to accept staggered payment because their salaries were low.

“The other mother, who works as a cleaner, also had to resort to this so that they could feed their children,” he said.
Ibrahim said the department’s Family Support Division had brought a case against the women’s former husbands.

The division is expected to take action against the two for failure to pay maintenance.
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I Highlight this story because there are many of us not only those who has gone through the syariah courts but the civil courts as well who are int he same boat!

Our country's laws do nothing to make it compulsary for the father to pay maintenance. Even the rates are so very low!

I remember my mom told her friend that in 1977 i was 6 yrs old then the judge set the monthly maintenance of RM200 for 3 kids per month! I was only 6 yrs old then, my sister was 5 and my brother was 3. I remember so vividly that my mom had this savage look of anger and frustration on her face because to top it of my dad's lawyer said he cannot afford that amount every month and asked to reduce it!

We had no house of our own. My mom worked 2 full time jobs and 1 part time job to make eds meet and in hopes of giving us a better life. My dear beloved mother worked until 2 weeks before she died!

And now i'm a single mother. My story will have to be told later. Right now i'm just too angry to write anymore, my memories are too vivid.

At exactly 11.20 am (coz I remember so vividly that, right after, I turned straight to the clock to see what time it was!) on Monday, the 10th of November 2008, My little girl was born. And she was surprisingly little at 2.66kgs only! Even though it felt like a creature from the movie “Aliens” was trying it’s damness to make it’s way outta my body at the time! Well being not allowed any of these modern days mode of pain reliever would make anyone believe the same I’m sure!

Anyway my point is at it’s been a 4 years since the day my daughter was born. And she has changes so very much since. It’s been a tough 4 years for me as well but that’s a different story.

She was named Katrina Thereza Altree. My little angel.

These 4 years as just flew by so very fast. I still feel she is a little baby and in truth yes she is. But oh how much she has grown. From 2.66 kg to 19kgs is a whole lot of difference and I just feel like crying where has my little baby gone too?

It seems just like an hour ago I was carrying her in my arms or changing her diaper and now she is busy answering me back! Running & jumping all over the place. Fighting with me just so she can skip her dinner to play with friends.

Oh how I dread having her turn into a teenager. I want my little baby back. I just want to hold her and rock her to sleep and sing her a lullaby just a few more times before she starts telling me “don’t embarrass me mama!”

Well that is what I wish and of coz it’s like wishing that time stood still. Pointless.

My darling Katrina, how I love her with all my heart and mind and soul. If only I can put my feelings in a bottle and let her see it when she’s grown up soon one day.

In many ways she is my life saver, my reason for going on. For waking up to another day. She motivates me, she keeps me going when I feel so down and as though the problems of all this world is on me. I just need to see her smile and I feel all is right with my world.

Her sunny smile is infectious. Her laughter, like music. Her non stop chatter, is prove that I’m not a lone. Her trusting love, is prove of God in my life. Her hugs, revives me her tiny kisses pours love into my heart renewing my spirit.

And so I pray Dear God bless and keep her safe, happy and healthy always. Watch over her and guide her.

And God, Thank you a million Thank you s will not cover my gratitude for the gift of My Precious Princess, My daughter, Katrina Thereza Altree.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY SWEETHEART!

Thoughts Of A Mom: Can I just slap you for making me feel so disgusted and insulted!?

Thoughts Of A Mom: Can I just slap you for making me feel so disgusted and insulted!?

Can I just slap you for making me feel so disgusted and insulted!?

I feel disgusted over what the Malacca government is trying to do! Truly I try to understand how they may think this was a good solution it’s because he is a man and has never ever been in the single mother’s shoes! I know that they think this is a good deed and this is helping the Single moms. But it just totally makes my skin crawl!

Here I quote from The Star Saturday November 1, 2008

Malacca may give RM1,000 to men who take them as second wives.

MARRIED men in Malacca may receive RM1,000 from the state government if they choose to take poor, single mothers as second wives, reported Harian Metro.

The daily quoted Malacca Chief Minister Datuk Seri Mohd Ali Rustam, (what a very narrow mind you have sir) who made the proposal, as stressing that the incentive would be given on condition, among others, that the men do not divorce their first wives. “May be the single mom who re-marries can be the servant as well as new concubine! Hey this will stop the men form going outside the home to have an affair! Oh yes and the kids will be little helpers around the house! On top of that there’s the RM1000 bonus the bugger gets paid! Way to go Datuk! Keep on thinking with your dick!”

He said the move was not to encourage polygamy but to ease the burden of single mothers who are dependent on welfare aid from various parties. “And just how will it ease the single mother’s burden when the money goes to the man?!”

“The matter is still being considered. ”Well my advise is better start un-considering it!” The state government will decide following discussions with various parties, including the Malacca Islamic Religious Department, Women and Family Development Council and Welfare Department,” he said.

Are we cows!? That you can just give away like an incentive?! Are we so worthless to this country that you need to give men money to marry us off?! Do you really think that getting re-married is the best solution?!

Have you ever considered that we are sick of men trying to undermine our independence? SO we are struggling, at least some of us do not have to put up with abusive men in our lives anymore!

Have you considered that getting re-married is a thought that will never cross the widow who longs for her dearest love who has left this world and never can she consider being re-married ever again?

Have you ever considered that those who have been deeply hurt and abandoned by their ex husbands will be likely to jump up and re-marry again!

Yes I do agree some of us are lucky enough to start a new life with someone new, but that new man should want to marry without the thought of RM1000 “reward” on his mind!

I’m not even going to touch on the 1^st wife that was mentioned! Go do some homework man!

What makes me so pissed off is: Why he would suggest giving the money to the men!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hwy cant he just suggest giving the money to the single mothers them selves irrelevant if they re-marry or choose to live their single lives!

STOP INSULTING US AND TREATING US LIKE LEFTOVERS AT A PARTY!